Life Lessons the Cast of ‘Friends’ Taught Us

L to R: David Schwimmer, Jennifer Aniston, Courteney Cox, Matthew Perry, Lisa Kudrow, Matt LeBlanc | Source: Warner Brothers Television

Many of us remember the first time we watched Friends and thinking how you couldn’t imagine life without this extraordinary cast. Wether you watched each week during its 10 season airing or (if you’re like me) began watching the re-runs in your high school days, Friends has been an important part of television since its very first pilot.

*Pilot– a television pilot is a standalone episode of a television series that is used to sell the show to a television network.

A couple weeks ago I wrote about Grace & Frankie, a Netflix series created by Marta Kauffman who also co-created, you guessed it, Friends! One of the reasons I chose to write about Friends is simply because as a growing adult, the topics of each of the episodes is so prevalent in my everyday life (as is many others). Growing up I didn’t quite understand the humor like I do now, and boy am I grateful! Below I will break down my top favorite moments that the cast of Friends taught myself, and many other fans, that we aren’t alone in the conquest for a promising career, everlasting love and a rally of support.

  1. Theres No One Way To Parent

Throughout the 10 season run of Friends, one of the most important lessons the show ever taught us was that there is more than one way to become a parent. Each of the three leading ladies represented the miracle of birth in their own ways; which I believe is one of the most beautiful things a show can do. In Season 4, Episode 12 we learn that Phoebe makes one of the biggest decisions of her life; she becomes a surrogate mother for her brother Frank Jr and his wife Alice. While these babies weren’t necessarily Phoebe’s children, the tear jerking scene of her talking to the babies after their delivery is heart wrenching. The surrogacy storyline was created by the writers who were inspired by the then pregnant, Lisa Kudrow (Phoebe).

In the Season 7 finale The One With Monica And Chandler’s Wedding, Part 2 we discover that Rachel is pregnant but the father of the baby has yet to be revealed. It isn’t until Season 8, Episode 2 that the audience and the characters discover that the father of Rachel’s baby is Ross creating one of the most memorable epilogues of the entire series. Eventually Rachel gives birth to baby Emma Geller-Green in the Season 8 finale. The season finale displays a strong female figure who embraces her new role as a single mother; a role in which Rachel Green masters.

Since first learning of Monica and Chandler’s relationship, audiences had been waiting to see what the pair would be like as parents. However, when planning a family, Monica and Chandler quickly learn that either of them are able to foster a healthy pregnancy, eventually deciding to adopt newborn twins from a woman named Erica. The series finale goes out with a bang showing a happy Monica and Chandler not only taking their babies home, but creating a new life for the entire Bing family. (I’ll expand on this in a minute) These three pregnancies throughout the series prove that there is conventional way of parenting and that life will sometimes throw unexpected curveballs. It is never too late to create a happy ending out of these situations.

2. I’ll Be There For You

Other than its catchy tune and intro, have you ever truly listened the lyrics of show’s theme song? It’s all about the growing pains of being a 20 something-year-old and navigating the good and bad days with the love and support of your friends. The entirety of Friends is just that, having your best friends there to hold you up when you’re down and cheer you on when you’re at your best.

There’s simply too many examples to condense into one whole paragraph so I’m going to pick my favorite which is the gang supporting Phoebe at every one of her coffee shop gigs. While the group clearly knows Phoebe isn’t the greatest singer, they continuously show their loving support at each of her shows. Below is a clip of them singing along to her song, Smelly Cat.

3. If You Want Something You Have To Work For It

A once spoiled rich girl, Rachel is cut off from her father’s fortune and left to pursue the rest of her adult life in the working world. With no prior job experience and a bare resume, she finds a job as a waitress at the Central Perk coffee shop which the gang frequents in nearly every episode. However, while being a less than exceptional waitress, Rachel is tired of not getting where she wants to be. In the Season 3 episode, The One Where Rachel Quits, Joey and Chandler challenge Rachel in her pursuit of working in the fashion industry. Realizing she hadn’t applied much effort into her career, Rachel quits the coffee shop and with the help of Joey, lands an interview with Fortunata Fashions. This ends up being her first introduction into the world of fashion which of course would lead to a big opportunity at Bloomingdales and eventually Ralph Lauren.

Who’s knows, without a little push from Joey and Chandler, Rachel may have never pursed her career of working in the fashion industry. If you want something bad enough, you just have to go for it! Joey is another exemplary figure of this as he goes from struggling small time actor to Dr. Drake Amore in The Days of Our Lives!

4. It’s Okay Not To Have Everything Planned Out

One of the lessons we learn as growing adults is that sometimes money can be strapped and that a set plan doesn’t always work out. Throughout the show half of the gang experiences financial success while the others are struggling. Before Rachel and Joey’s success and Phoebe’s small coffee shop gigs, the three of them struggled to keep up with the sometimes extravagant dinners their friends would plan. The Season 2 episode titled, The One With Five Steaks and an Eggplant displays the financial differences between the group and the means to find a common ground. I can definitely relate to this episode as the list of things we want to do in life can sometimes be bigger than what we can afford. And if that means having to sit a few things out, that’s okay!

The series also shows that sometimes the path to success can take many detours to get there. As we know, Joey has been a working actor from theatre to small time commercials. With much determination, Joey eventually lands a starring role as Dr. Drake Amore in The Days of Our Lives which not only catapults his career as an actor but also helps him financially. Monica also faces an unexpected detour in her career when she is forced to work at a 50’s themed diner. Donning a costume, wig and inflatable chest, she does the best she can to make the most of her culinary career. Eventually Monica lands her dream job as head chef at Alessandro’s.

Sometimes life can hands us curveballs that forces us to adjust and adapt to difficult situations. If there’s one lesson the cast of Friends taught me, it’s that with a little support from your friends and a fiery determination, good things will come out of less than ideal situations and that lessons are always to be learned. A lesson I’ve learned as a growing adult is that it’s never fair to place a clock on your goals, things will happen when they’re meant to happen!

5. It’s Okay To Move On

The last bow – series finale | Source: Warner Brothers Television

With 10 extraordinary seasons under their belt, it was finally time for the cast of Friends to say goodbye. If you’re a fan of the show you’ll know that Monica and Chandler are essentially the binding anchor of the group and that with their decision to move their family to the suburbs, it would change the dynamic of the group forever.

As we grow up, we learn that it can be easy to settle into routine and total normalcy, but again life isn’t perfect. Friends get promotions, families get bigger and new futures begin. Even when our plans change, expand and new life begins, its never a goodbye, its always a see you later. Friendship and love go hand in hand and while saying goodbye to an old chapter can sometimes hurt, change is always healthy and necessary. I can’t tell you how many times I have reflected on a moment of my life before moving on, as I’m sure many of us have with sadness but overwhelmingly good memories. While there are glimmers of sadness, there is always room for new and refreshing memories to come.

That’s the remarkable thing about the show, it never failed to display complete and utter realism. You’ll always have your friends by your side, during the good and the bad. A lot can happen in 1o years, but to reflect on how much you’ve grown as a whole is something truly amazing.

What were your favorite moments from Friends? Has the show’s characters connected with you in a way? I think we all know a friend who resembles each of these characters. I know I do, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

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